On the night of 19th/3/2015 I had the most disturbing dream.I discovered through experience that the only way to remember a dream is to write it down immediately you wake up when its fresh.So I did so three hours later.Even though I didn’t capture every detail,I was able to remember some bits of it.
So here goes the story.
I was lost in quarantine lab.I saw people who were being quarantined for infectious viruses.I didn’t understand what I was doing there. Last thing I remembered was hanging out with my friends Olive and Mercy and Mercy and I were paying Olive some money we owed her.I then saw myself outside the quarantine lab.I started tracing my way back,I don’t know why ad want to get back in there. I figured out my way back but,as I was walking towards the direction that I thought would lead me back to the lab,I found myself standing at the entrance junction of KTTC,the place where I was born and raised.
I then saw an old friend of mine Susan Murungi whom we grew up with but she is way younger than me.
Funny thing is,we never used to talk much with Susan given that she was younger than me,so I don’t get why after 10 or more years she just appears in my dream.
Moving on, she sat at the pavement with a very close friend of mine,Munga. I asked Munga whether he had been told. He seemed abit confused and asked me what was that that he needed to be told. On hearing my question Susan laughed and told me that she had,read the letter I wrote to Munga. She further added that boys don’t hide such things. I then asked Munga whether he gave Susan the letter. He noded his head to signfy that indeed he had given Susan the letter.With balancing tears in my eyes, I looked at him straight in his eyes and asked him,”nobody has told you?” I thought that maybe someone had told him that he is dead and that he should not mingle with people thiking that he is still alive. I don’t understand why I was asking him about a letter because I don’t even remember what was on it but I guess I had told him that he was dead in the supposed letter.
He looked back at me with balancing tears and before I could ask why he was crying,I woke up. Well, I thought I woke up. I then thought to myself, wow,this time Munga has spoken in my dream, this means I have gotten over his death. See,in the past when I used to get nightmares of Munga,he never talked but instead,his eyes would turn blood shot.
As I lay in bed,I saw Walala carrying a white placard written in black ink.Walala is another friend of mine who died in his sleep 3 months before Munga.The only words I can remember written on that placard were 4 dead,4 injured. I then saw a girl lying on a bed beside mine. I realized that I was actually dead.How did I realized that I was dead you’d ask,well,I have no idea,dreams have a weird way of bringing out the reality of things.Two women came to me and told me that I had seen enough and pushed me back to my casket and it hurt like crazy.I asked myself if It was even possible to feel pain if at all am dead.I looked at the girl next to me and she was busy eating her last meal before she too gets tossed in her casket.I wondered is she crazy?Doesn’t she realize we are dead and that its a sad moment for us to even think about food.My thoughts were interrupted as one of the women kissed my forehead and chanted what seemed to be some latin or greek words.I then saw myself in a bus with no driver.I looked outside and saw how the world had changed and all I could think of was,how the hell did I let myself die,how did I die,why did I die.I still have alot to do on earth,I didn’t tell guys goodbye, how long will I stay dead?When is Jesus coming back?It was my first day in the world of the dead but I was already bored.So I consoled myself that people have been dead for a long time and I too will adapt within no time.
As the bus drove on,darkness came in.It was night time.I guess we were driving along langata road from Rongai and I realized that a bad accident had just occurred. I saw dead people all over the road. I pitied them because I knew they were coming to join me.
I was very sad and stressed in this new “life”. I longed to be alive again,but I knew it was impossible.
As I began to adjust myself in my new “life”,I woke up.
I have never been that happy,scared and relieved at the same time.A wave of emotions swept through my mind.For the first few seconds I kept asking myself over and over again,am I really alive?It was 5am. Thank God it wasn’t 2am because there was no way I was ever getting back to sleep after that.I turned on the lights and realized that one of my giant bunnies that was given to me by my guy had fallen from the wall where I usually hung it.
weird I thought. But hey,am not suggesting any paranormal activities,the cheap hook I bought must have come loose.
I then woke up and headed to the shower, meditating on the night events.
My dream showed me how life is important and that its a gift.That morning I appreciated life like never before.
Thank God that you are alive regardless of whether you are suffering,a beggar in the streets etc.Am telling you from what I saw,one would rather be a beggar in the streets than dead.The worst part is to rest without peace.I kind of understood why they say rest in peace when someone dies.
I am thankful to God for being alive.Its about time I start fully utilizing it before I visit that place again.
As I read through my dream,I couldn’t help but sigh because had I not written it down as soon as I could,I wouldn’t have remember all that because even as I read,I can’t remember seeing some of the things I just wrote.
I thank God for my friends who comforted me after sharing with them this ordeal.One even told me that such dreams mean that its an end of something and that something new is coming and encouraged me to read dream psychology.The last thing one needs after going through such a horrific nightmare is a set of interrogations and being reminded that God only gives rest to his beloved ones.
Hmmm maybe when I read this months or years later,I will be able to connect the dots.Even as I battle this alone,the battle belongs to the Lord.And even though I didn’t sleep well,ad want to think that am one of His beloved ones,or am I not?